Starbucks Drive Thru (Reader Challenge!) - Terrible Ad of the Week / News and updates

Hello readers and discerning consumers! It's April 15 - did you pay your taxes today? If you did, you are clearly not a marketing genius like me.

Let me fill you in on a little secret: as a marketing genius, I have found that I acquire wealth faster by not paying my taxes. In fact, the quickest way to see a 10% - 20% increase in your wealth within one year is to not pay your taxes or make any contributions to social security. There are many ways to do this. You might hide your money in a mattress or deposit it in an off-shore account in the Caymans. Or, for a fraction of the cost of real currency, you could print your own fake money and send that to the IRS. Me? I prefer laundering my income through a certain "non-profit" internet blog. There are literally no rules in the economic jungle.
My personal finance model - for educational purposes only
Speaking of deadlines, there are only 15 more days left in April for you to submit an ad for the Terrible Reader Ad of the Month! (How's that for you, Jamfla?) Who will it be? What terrible ad will torture us this time? Why hasn't anyone submitted an ad since last month? You can submit your ads here, and you can check out last month's TRAOTM here. Don't miss your chance to be part of the greatest marketing blog of ALL TIME.*

At this point, many of you regular readers are probably saying "Wait, where in the hell is the Terrible Ad of the Week?" and "Why does Dan appear to be phoning it in this week?" Well, loyal readers, I'm phoning it in because I'm working on an extra special project for next week's entry. It's going to be revolutionary, so don't miss it.

But don't think that I'm going to leave you hanging without a terrible ad this week. In fact, I have a special challenge that will test your discerning consumer skills to the core. I now present you with the Advertisements Explained Terrible Ad of the Week Reader Challenge!

A couple weeks ago, I snapped this picture of some terrible marketing in the Starbucks Drive Thru:

Click on the picture to see the big version

Using the array of discerning consumer skills that you've no doubt developed as a reader of this blog, do the following:

1. Analyze this Starbucks advertising and find everything that is wrong with it.
2. Post your observations in the comments section below.
3. Wait attentively.

Later this week, I will return like Gandalf charging down the hill to Helm's Deep at dawn on the third day and post my own observations (or the answers, if you will) to this Starbucks marketing debacle. In the meantime, I will be working on the special project for next week.

Good luck readers!

* This claim is based on the fact that someone found my blog last week by Googling the terms "world's greatest marketing genius" - thank you, Google Analytics, for telling me what everyone already knows.

Terrible Reader Ad of the Month - World's Best Cat Litter

Hello readers! Can you believe that you've already been reading Advertisements Explained for a month now? It seems like just yesterday that I launched this site and turned the advertising world on its head. In that short time, Advertisements Explained has had over 700 page views, and I've received lots of great feedback from discerning consumers like yourselves. Can't you just feel your quality of life improving with your newfound marketing insights? (Let us know how your life has improved in the Comments section below.)

Of course, this also means that it's time to announce our first ever Terrible Reader Ad of the Month! Many of you submitted terrible ads this month, and choosing the most terrible of these was no easy feat. However, because I am a marketing genius, I was able to narrow it down to one truly terrible, terrible ad that really scrapes the bottom of the marketing barrel.

The ad is for a product called World's Best Cat Litter, and it was submitted by our loyal reader and discerning consumer Freda. I would try to describe it myself, but Freda pretty much said it best in her description of the ad:

"People smelling cat pee. Sick."

So, without further adieu, the Terrible Reader Ad of the Month for March 2011:

As you can see, the marketing strategy over at World's Best Cat Litter is to sell the product with the World's Worst Advertising. I think the real marketing genius here is whoever convinced these people to sniff vials of cat urine and put cat litter in their mouths. From one marketing genius to another, bravo World's Best Cat Litter!

And congratulations to Freda on winning the inaugural Terrible Reader Ad of the Month competition! If you haven't submitted a terrible ad yet, you can do so 24/7 by using the Submit an Ad form above. And if you submitted an ad last month, don't worry, you're still in the running for next month's competition.

Until next time, keep your discerning eyes peeled for terrible ads, and keep reading Advertisements Explained for the worst ads and the hottest marketing insights!

Submit an Ad

Hello, readers! Lately, many of you have been approaching me in the street and sending me large amounts of email. You all say "Dan, we can already see the changes in our lives thanks to your blog!" Indeed, many of you are already becoming discerning consumers with a keen eye for terrible advertising. I could not be more excited about this!

Now that so many of you are out there using your marketing insights to rip apart terrible ads, I'm getting more and more recommendations on ads and commercials to feature in Advertisements Explained. However, other than stalking me at my home or flooding my inbox with suggestions, there hasn't been an easy way to contact me and suggest an ad for the blog. Just look at this reader trying to suggest an ad last week:

Well, no longer! Today, I'm proud to announce a new feature on Advertisements Explained: the Submit an Ad page! Just click on the Submit an Ad tab above to have your voice heard here at the Advertisements Explained offices.

Did you see a terrible advertisement that you think I should feature? Tell me about it! Maybe you'd like to see a new feature on the blog, like some pop up ads or flashing lights. Or maybe you'd like to apply for our competitive summer internship.* Either way, the Submit an Ad page gives you the opportunity to contribute to the great work we're doing here.

Also, as an added bonus, one reader submission will be chosen each month as our Reader Ad of the Month! Not only will your submission be forever cemented in the Advertisements Explained archives, but your name and blog address will be viewed by thousands† of readers worldwide. Eternal fame and glory will be yours!

I'm looking forward to reading your submissions, so keep your discerning eye peeled for terrible ads, and use the Submit an Ad page often!

*Now accepting applications. 2.8 GPA required, must provide own transportation. Must be good at not fucking up Starbucks orders and getting pizzas. Owning your own X-box 360 controller preferred.

†Actual number of readers may vary.